The Luchazi Customary Code of Conduct: A Guide to Etiquette and Respect
The Luchazi Customary Code of Conduct
The Luchazi customary code of conduct is a cherished set of social norms that defines our etiquette. It emphasizes deep respect, adherence to tradition, and genuine consideration for others. More than just a list of rules, it is the "Luchazi way of life"—a philosophy that values character and teaches us how to carry ourselves with dignity in every situation.
Here are the key pillars of the Luchazi code:
Honour those who came before you. Always be the first to greet the elderly in your community. A Luchazi proverb reminds us: “A li ha citsizi ke ku nona njamba,” meaning that when you stand on another's shoulders, the elephant you see is not yours alone. We respect our elders because they built the foundation upon which we see the world.
Greetings are sacred. When greeting nobles, elders, parents or in-laws, use rhythmic handclaps and a verbal greeting rather than a handshake or a nod. For close friends or grandparents, a "touch-and-clap" greeting is appropriate.
Humility is shown through posture. Never speak to a seated elder while standing; instead, kneel or squat to their level. If you must address a crowd, always seek permission from the elders present before standing. Lastly, never point with your index finger—it is considered a sign of poor breeding.
Explain what you are saying, and do not rush. Livandeke mu ku handeka. Do not dominate the room. Listen more than you speak, and never interrupt or finish someone else’s sentence.
Keep your voice at a respectful volume and choose your words carefully. As the proverb says: “Ve ku aluluka ku muhela; mu kanua iya ua alulukilemo?” (People can turn over in bed, but who can turn back the words of their mouth?). Once spoken, words cannot be taken back.
Avoid discussing controversial topics unless you are fully informed. Not every conversation is worth joining. We say: “Ua tsa mu ciliva ca mbala; ua samatela mutue”—he who is caught in another's trap has stuck his own head into it.
When an elder speaks, give them your full attention. Never "exchange words" or argue when being corrected; silence is often the most respectful response to a rebuke.
Politeness is the language of the wise. Use phrases like lisesa (excuse me), muane (please), eyo (yes), and nja santsela or nja sangala (thank you) to demonstrate your courtesy.
Follow the guidance of parents and guardians without hesitation. The proverb asks: “Via ku tuma, ku takinia, ni ku mina?” (That which you are sent to do, is it to be chewed or swallowed?). Simply do what is asked without overthinking the task.
Before starting your day’s work—whether farming or fishing—you are expected to check on the well-being of the elderly, the sick, and the vulnerable. This is ku menekela or ku hinduisa. A wise person rises early to care for the community, while the foolish only see their own immediate needs.
Respect personal space, especially with the opposite gender. Additionally, once a person becomes a parent, avoid using their first name. Address them as Sa- (Father of) or Nia- (Mother of) followed by the name of their firstborn, such as SaMusole.
Specific boundaries exist to maintain honour between families. Traditionally, a man avoids direct contact or long gazes with his mother-in-law. If they meet on a path, the younger person should yield the way out of deep-seated respect.
Public displays of affection, like hugging or kissing, are forbidden in Luchazi society. We value personal space and avoid over-familiarity. However, grandparents may kiss the palms of their grandchildren as a sacred sign of blessing.
- Swimming: Grown sons do not swim with mothers or sisters; daughters do not swim with fathers or brothers.
- Bedrooms: Grown children do not enter their parents' bedrooms, and vice versa. Similarly, brothers and sisters respect the privacy of each other's sleeping quarters.
Historically, the ndzango (village meeting space) was reserved for men and elderly women. Younger women would only approach during specific rituals or ceremonies.
Moderation is key. Overindulgence in food or drink is frowned upon. Interestingly, women who have reached menopause gain new social privileges, such as sharing drinks at the Ndzango or dancing near the Makisi (masked dancers).
The Likisi represent powerful spirits. It is strictly taboo for women or uninitiated men to touch or hug a masked dancer. Any disrespect toward a Likisi is considered a grave insult to the culture.
A well-behaved person avoids mentioning private parts or female anatomy in public. Asking personal questions about a woman’s health especially menstrual issues or private life is considered a breach of etiquette.
Luchazi culture maintains distinct social boundaries regarding those who have not yet undergone traditional circumcision rites (vilima). Handshakes with strangers are often avoided in favour of more traditional greetings.
Always use both hands when receiving a gift or item from an elder. When giving, always use your right hand to show respect.
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